sleepdeprived rambling mommy

Due to lack of sleep, my brain is all over the place - hence the title of this post. No creativity today. So please excuse my rambles.

Attempting to go green: I've been inspired by my friend, neighbor and fellow blogger, Danielle, to try to go green. First, she opened my eyes to what kind of health products I was using on Alessia and directed me to Skin Deep to check the safety of what I was using. End result: I got rid of all the stuff I originally bought and got safer products. Alessia's skin actually seems better since getting rid of soaps and lotions containing fragrance. I would love to try cloth diapers after hearing her review after using them on Eliza, but my mom (who will be watching Alessia when I return to work) is not feeling it, so I'm keeping the disposable. Besides, I don't know how long I would last with them anyway with the yucky breastfed poopy diapers. Maybe when she's a little older and less disgusting down there. Next came cleaning products. I've always been a little weary about what kind of chemicals I'm inhaling every time I clean the bathroom - when I was pregnant, I refused to do it. Luckily Mark cleaned them for me. Then my aunt got me thinking about the cleaners I was using in the kitchen, and I started to worry a little. Danielle has reviewed some good eco-friendly cleaning products, but when you're on a tight budget and on maternity leave with no pay it's hard to rationalize to the hubs spending the green on greener cleaning supplies when we have a ton of "traditional" ones. She mentioned using vinegar to clean some things in the home, so I decidede to look into it and see just how far you could go. I found some info here and here on how to clean just about everything in your home with vinegar, baking soda and lemon juice. So I'm trying it out. So far, I've used distilled white wine vinegar in lieu of fabric softener. I was a little skeptical that my clothes would smell like stinky feet but they didn't. In fact, they were just as soft as when I use fabric softener. I've also used diluted vinegar to clean the kitchen and bathrooms with equal satisfaction. The faucets have never been so shiney! I used baking soda to clean my stovetop and was very impressed. It worked better than the commercial products I had been using to cut through cooked on grease. While I'm happy with my greener cleaning, I'm getting some slack from Mark and my mom, who both think I'm crazy. But I'm used to that, especially after I freaked out over the main ingredient (triclosan) in the antibacterial hand soap we all use and rushed to the store to get what I called "non-toxic" soap. See what happens when I read??

And the award for worst mommy in the world goes to....
Since Alessia was born, I sometimes feel like the worst mom ever. For example, when I let her sleep on her tummy, when she screams as if being tortured to death in the car, when I strap her into her stroller for a walk even if she's crying just so I can get out of the house and get some fresh air and drink my coffee. And this morning. As we embarked on our daily morning walk with Danielle and Eliza (which will be missed terribly starting Tuesday), Alessia fussed and cried as usual. Every few steps, I would stop to try to figure out what was wrong. Are the straps too tight? Is something pinching her? Did part of her body fall off and I didn't notice?? Then I check her earrings...the left one has dried blood caked on it. OH MY GOD WHAT HAPPENED!?! I have no idea when or how it happened, but it must have either gotten caught on something or she pulled it. Probably the latter since there was also a scratch on that side of her face, by her ear. Mind you, I had her ears peirced 5 weeks ago, and this never happened. This one earring was not as tight as the other, and when I got home and checked it as I cleaned it with alcohol, it looks like the back is pissed off and she cut it a little. Now her little earlobe looks a little swollen to me. Why in the world did I peirce her ears??!! Every little girl in my family has had their ears pierced around 3 months, so I didn't even think twice. I think they're adorable. However, I'm always freaking out that she'll get hurt. And now it has happened. And it's all my fault. She doesn't seem to care or be in pain -though maybe that's one of the reasons she woke up so much last night - but I feel horrible. We have a dr. appointment this afternoon (and she's getting shots again), so Mark said to just have him look at it. So he can look at me disapprovingly and confirm that I'm a bad mommy?? Just hand the award over now.

Speaking of the doctor - at her 8 week appt. they gave her 4 shots. Poor baby! 2 in each leg, so no matter what side I nursed her on, she was in pain. I told Mark he has to back me up, especially if I chicken out, but there is no way they're doing that again!! No more than 2 at a time. I don't care if I have to go back next week for the rest, but there's no need, in my opinion, to do so many at once. And I've spoken endless times about her Alessia hates hates hates the car, especially later in the day. Our appt is at 4:30 and the office is about an hour away, so I'm not looking forward to that drive. And I'm really not looking forward to the one home, especially after her shots and the night we had (nothing major, just no sleep for mommy). I think I'll pawn her off on daddy for that ride home. See, aren't I horrible??

Okay, I think that's enough rambling, don't you? If you actually read the whole thing, thanks!! If not, I don't blame you! I'll leave you with a pic of my cutie pie who is 4 months today!